Some of us have little (or big) “triggers”. Things that trip us up at random or test the person we want to be. It causes a reaction, we make a choice and we get a mixed result. It’s sometimes as little as someone taking over your car without indicating, missing your train by a fraction of a second, or someone eating the last donut when they already had one and you didn’t. We have every right to react however we do, but sometimes the way we react has consequences or causes us to do something we soon regret. These are all small examples of course and the thing is, when we dont know how to not act out of emotion with something minimal, how do we automatically respond when the situation is grand.
Life with a bird’s eye view
I’ve started approaching situations that test me with a bird’s eye view. Like I’m playing an intellectual video game with life, viewing from third person. I draw out an imaginary timeline in my brain and look at this significant moment, try to tally up all the responses and what each of those responses lead to (think Doctor Strange at the end of Infinity War or Beth in The Queen’s Gambit), and come to realisation and decision that more times than none, the way I wanted to react out of emotion, isn’t going to play out how I like and that small moment of satisfaction won’t last long.
Playing in third person
Not only with emotional or intellectual hurdles, but this is an awesome technique for physical activity. For anyone who practices a sport (for me that is jiujitsu), taking an outward approach on the situation is an awesome way to achieve your end goal. In jiujitsu at least, I like to zoom out, look at the positioning and work out the next move, frame by frame. If they do this, I do this, If I do this, they do this, and so on and so forth, until one of us is checkmated. I can imagine this being beneficial in any sport. Like a slow motion version, giving your brain time to think, respond and execute.
How to live a life without regrets
I want and try to live a life with no regrets. So does this mean I do whatever I want, however i feel at that moment in time and never regret my decision? Or do I try to act in the way of the person I want to be and if I fall short, at least I know I tried and therefore have no regrets in my actions? If you know what’s going to affect you mentally then why not act out in a way that will have the opposite affect. Do something that makes you turn to your past self and say “I am proud of you”. I feel like more moments like these are the key to self love. If you’re like me, sometimes doing the thing will make me more proud than not doing anything at all. Or holding my tongue when I want to blurt out, usually doesn’t end with me hitting myself over the head with regret.
To be honest, I understand everyone is different, everyone has different views and if I’ve learnt anything in this life so far, its that there is no right or wrong way to go about life. So whether you agree with me or not, these are just my thoughts here, take it or leave it. Its more or less just something to think about and/or get you to not scroll or swipe for a minute of your life.
Now go do something to make your future self proud! Whether thats waking up to seethe sun rise, or going to the gym instead of watching tv, or reading that book you’ve been putting off for a while, or applying for that dream job you haven’t had the balls to put yourself on the line for. Just do it!
Peace