I used to hate silence but now I love it. I appreciate and understand it.
When I wrote ‘Blogger Brain’, it was the first time in a long time where I had total and utter silence. No people talking, no one to talk to and nothing stimulating my ears except water and fabric.
When I was getting ready to sleep, I realised that my brain was going a million miles an hour and evidently was the reason for my constance listening to drain the thoughts. It was always music, now mostly podcasts and occasionally a show or movie. Draining the silence meant silencing my thoughts. But why is this a bad thing? I used to hate it. Mainly because I wouldn’t be able to fall asleep but now I have sort of mastered silencing that voice or at least focusing my mind elsewhere to silence the chatter (thanks yoga nidra) and falling asleep quite easily.
But the thoughts aren’t a bad thing, they’re just thoughts. It’s the most normal and natural thing next to breathing , which is another thing we tend to never think about. Breathing and thinking. The two tings that happens without us even putting any effort and yet we can be doing these things wrong our whole lives and not realise it. Just living without consciousness. Completely out of control…
I think we’ve forgotten that we’re supposed to be alone with our thoughts. We’re supposed spend time with ourselves, unstimulated. Our poor society has adapted to the world of technology and never allowing ourselves to truely be alone. Think about it – if you’re listening to a podcast, music, watching a show or on the phone, you’re never really alone are you? How are you supposed to get to know yourself properly. How are you supposed to ask the uncomfortable questions that humble yourself. How are you supposed to let idea form and connect with you. How do you ever know why you’re feeling the way you’re feeling if you never stop to actually ask yourself the question…
Or maybe I’m just blabbering nonsense and this is why I shouldn’t be left alone with my thoughts!
¯\_ (ツ)_/¯